Muggy with a chance of ham bone

The 10k on Saturday went really, really well. Yeah, really well. For the first five miles. Then... not so well.

Whoever thought it a good idea to start a 10k at 8AM in Alabama in September after a week of rain has never run a 10k, doesn't own a thermometer, and has never heard the term "relative humidity." When the race started, it felt like we were running in a boiling pot. About mile 3 someone poured split peas into the pot. At mile 4, the cook added a few cubes of beef bullion. By mile 5 the boiling, roiling, viscous, gelatinous, goo that passes for atmosphere in this God-forsaken, "sub-tropical" purgatory called 'Bama was so thick and oppressive that I could have stopped mid-stride and remained suspended approximately four inches off the scorching asphalt.

Yes, it was that muggy. And to be fair, I did not hydrate as well as I should have. But come on! A Mainer of Scottish ancestry has no chance in conditions like that.

Miles 3 through 5 were excruciatingly painful. I focused on maintaining my stride and posture and keeping the race leader (a girl, who was barely sweating--the ignominy of it!) within sight. That worked. I passed the 5 mile mark in 32:26, on pace to run a 40:15. Then I blew up and finished in 42:10. I got passed by a guy wearing basketball shorts. He also was not sweating. I assume he was wearing his wick-away asbestos UnderArmour outfit and an air conditioning unit under his cotton t-shirt. I watched him and the girl pull away from me for the last 1.2 miles and dragged my legs into the finishing chute.

So, no 40-minute 10k for me this year. Because I live in a city that values running about as much as it values recycling (which is to say, almost not at all), this was the second of only two 10k's on the calendar this year. I ran both. And didn't get close to 40 minutes.

Now back to duathlon. I've got one more this year, coming up in a month. I'll report back. In the meantime, I better go out and buy a case for Charles, who undoubtedly will break 40 before I.